My Story

Four Years On

November 4, 2015 by Sara Diamond 3 Comments

If you’re old enough, you remember where you were during the Kennedy assassination (I was in kindergarten and we were sent home early that day). And even if you’re youngish, you’ll remember where you were during the 9-11 attacks (I was in law school and we were sent home early that day).

Cancer patients and survivors have their own sets of terrible anniversaries. For many it’s diagnosis day. Each time it comes around on the calendar, there are sad remembrances and a look back in the rear view mirror at all that has happened since.… Continue reading »

My Maggie

May 6, 2015 by Sara Diamond 12 Comments

It’s close to a year since I started this blog, and it’s long past time that I write about the beautiful creature who appears in the photo with me on my web site. She’s my dog Maggie.

Last month, there were news reports to the effect that when dogs and humans gaze into each other’s eyes, both species experience a rise in oxytocin, the hormone linked to trust and maternal bonding. No kidding!

Everywhere we go, people ask a set of questions about Maggie, her stats. … Continue reading »

The Personal and the Political, Part Three

April 22, 2015 by Sara Diamond 2 Comments

The last few weeks’ blog posts elicited some provocative comments from readers and dredged up some more memories for me.

The contemplation of forgiveness raises the question of how one should respond to others. Are there categories of others, and are we justified in having different responses to them based on our own judgments about who they are and what they do or have done? Is everyone equal, or not?

I like the passage from Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice that goes like this: “The quality of mercy is not strained. … Continue reading »

The Personal and the Political, Part Two

April 15, 2015 by Sara Diamond 6 Comments

Two weeks ago, I made a foray into writing about my political activist history, by way of starting to consider how to present this aspect of my life in a spiritual memoir.

I received a couple of comments off-site to the effect that I was brave for connecting my activist impulses to having been a survivor of child abuse.

Two readers who knew me thirty years ago took issue with my saying that my project to stop the Christian Right had failed. … Continue reading »

A Glimpse of Chemotherapy

March 4, 2015 by Sara Diamond 1 Comment

The facts about chemotherapy are well known and easy to find.

The experience of chemotherapy is like no other, and not known to those who haven’t had it.

Chemotherapy is a big, scary word. Try saying it in a room full of middle-aged women, and watch how many of them will lower their heads and look away. They don’t know what “it” is, but they know that “it” could happen to them.

Chemotherapy is the standard of care for many types of cancer because it’s effective at killing cancer cells and because it increases survival rates across aggregate data, large samples of people.… Continue reading »

Three Years Ago

February 18, 2015 by Sara Diamond 5 Comments

Our minds and bodies hold visceral memories of things that happened in certain seasons.

Three years ago, in February, I started chemotherapy.

I was as prepared as I could be for getting the drug infusion every three weeks, feeling awful for part of each of six cycles over four months.

What I was not prepared for was the tsunami that hit my social life during the year of treatment.

The crisis of cancer doesn’t come in its own neat package. Instead, it can throw a spotlight on everything else going on in one’s life, good and bad. … Continue reading »

Safe Again, Still

October 15, 2014 by Sara Diamond 2 Comments

My old friend Bonnie and I were sitting in the Sutter hospital cafeteria last Friday. She was eating a bowl of grits and I was drinking black tea and we were swapping stories of our respective surgeries and treatments for breast cancer, mine going on three years ago, hers going on eight years ago. We were telling some of the same stories we’ve told over and over when I commented that we’re becoming like old war vets, repeating ourselves. “Yeah,” she said. … Continue reading »

The “Sky Room”

August 27, 2014 by Sara Diamond Leave a Comment

There is really no such thing as cancer being “over.” At best, there is a focus on staying in healthy remission and an awareness of those who are not faring well.

For some, cancer treatment ends with surgery followed by chemotherapy and/or radiation. For others, there are ongoing drug regimens, each bringing its own benefits and side effects.

Women who’ve had certain types of breast cancer are offered a set of drugs that suppress the hormones that cancer cells would otherwise thrive on. … Continue reading »

Cancer is Not a “Gift,” Part One

August 20, 2014 by Sara Diamond 9 Comments

When I was smack in the middle of six rounds of chemotherapy, I was working almost full time, and I also had the strength to cultivate a vibrant spring vegetable garden. I was doing everything I could to keep myself in good health.

I had an email exchange with a colleague, an attorney who was then working in my office building. I often referred clients to her for areas I don’t work on. I also knew that she’s a yoga teacher.… Continue reading »

My Story, Part 3

July 16, 2014 by Sara Diamond Leave a Comment

I had a very hard time during cancer treatment. It wasn’t the chemo or the radiation that almost did me in. It was the way I was treated by many people I had thought were my friends.

If there’s any way in which cancer is a “gift” – and that’s not at all how I would describe it — it’s the power cancer has to reveal and make vivid some uncomfortable truths. For me, it was a huge eye opener on the question of “what is a friend?” I have a lot to learn about this subject, and cancer accelerated the learning curve.… Continue reading »